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I haven't been updating this blog for the last few weeks. My life isn't exactly uneventful. I just don't feel like writing especially that I have nothing good to talk about. I even delayed on updating the blog. However, finally, yesterday I had the urge to work on it. And today, I'm gonna write something. Let me do this post by putting some quotes from people I've encountered these last few weeks...

"Sir, pumayat ka..." were the words of my former student, Annabelle, in Fatima when we chanced upon seeing each other in Red Ribbon, Grand Central. I told her that I was down with dengue virus and flu for almost two weeks, thus I lost weight. I thought that that was it when Tita Vangie and Ate Thet also mentioned my weight lost. It would be nice to know that I'm getting thin (although I'm not big) but they made it sound uncomplimentary. Hindi naman ako buto't balat ngayon but I came to realized that I haven't been eating the way I eat before I got sick. Mabilis ako mabusog ngayon (which is nice because I really don't wanna gain so much weight since I'm not doing any hard labor or exercises).

Another thing that contributed to the weight lost are my frequent asthma attacks. I haven't been sleeping well because the lost of breath would wake me up early in the morning. The medicine that I am taking doesn't seem to work well. Not to mention the cough and colds that trigger the ashtma more. It went on for almost two weeks! It's a good thing that Tita Vangie recommended another medicine that she took when she was in the US. It worked really good! In a matter of minutes, my breath had cleared and so are my nose and throat.

So probably, because of the recent developments, I'd be back in better shape in a couple of weeks. I don't wanna gain too much weight, though...

***

"To tell you the truth, the workshop is full..."

I went to GMA-7 to enroll in their Film and TV Production Workshop on Oct. 28. Sad to say, nasaraduhan ako ng slots. Ga, the frontman, however, told me and the rest of the wannabe-enrollees to at least get interviewed. The team may open another batch because of the turnout of enrollees. He also said that the workshop was on a first-come first-serve basis so we should have enrolled prior to that day. Unfortunately, when I called them a week before, I wasn't inform about it. That's why I went there in full confidence. What I didn't realize, though, was there were so many wannabe-workshoppers!

Anyway, so I was in the waiting area for a couple of minutes when it was my turn to be interviewed. Direk Ryan (didn't get his surname), the workshop facilitator, told me that we have three options. First, if the management would let them open another batch which is quite a shot in the moon since they have already exceeded the maximum number of 30 workshoppers the other day. 50 na that time. Still, he said he'd try to fight for it. Second, I'd be on the wait list. In case someone backs out, I might able to get in. Since it's a first-come first-serve basis, in my opinion, I don't think I'd get in. Sa dami ng applicants before me, they'd get in first before I do! Unless everyone in the sure batch backs out! Third, sure bet would be February, the opening of the next workshop!

I thought of contacting Tita Racquel (Villavicencio) through dad because she might be the script writing facilitator. However, I didn't want to drop any names on my behalf. Kuya Alvin also contacted someone about it but I didn't know who. The thing is, the help is fully appreciated but I want to get in on my own. Luckily, Direk Ryan thought that my application form is quite impressive. It seemed like I was really into doing it. I hope it would give me the edge next time.

If I only knew back in high school that I would really be into movies, I would've taken up Mass Comm. Anyway, I'd just do my best to go within my dreams reach...

***

"Sorry for the delay, ah? Hinihintay lang namin ung payment ng ads..."

Three months have passed and I haven't received any payment from the magazine! What pisses me off the most is that I had to ask them first before they'd tell me. Parang lumalabas pa na ako ang naghahabol when in fact, it was them who owe me something! I even received a "Hus this?" message when I sent the editor a message a few days before. He told me that he lost his pay fone book and he hasn't updated it since. So imagine, I was waiting for his message for nothing! It meant that if I didn't send him any message, I wouldn't hear from him again. How about sending an e-mail? Has he lost my address, as well?! Kung ganito ang kalakaran sa writing business, luluwa ata ang mga mata ko sa paghihintay!

See? I told you that I have nothing good to write about... *sigh*

When You Thought It Wouldn't Happen To You

For about two weeks now, I been having an on and off fever. It started two Mondays ago. But after Tuesday, fever was gone. The Saturday that came after, Biboy and I met in Megamall. However, I went first to LRT Northmall to buy some supplies. I didn't realize how heavy the stuffs were that half of the way through Megamall, I felt pain in my right arm. I was perspiring a lot so my shirt was all wet. Not to mention that it was also raining then. When I got off the MRT, I decided to ask Biboy to fetch me because I really couldn't hold on to the baggages anymore.

In Megamall, we went to see a movie. T'was cold inside the theater especially with my shirt being wet. After dinner, we went home. That was the time I had the fever once more. Feeling ko nabinat ko. The next morning, my right arm was hurting a lot. But the pain eases about two days after, But the fever was on and off. Throughout the whole week, I was feeling so weak. I have lost my appetite, as well. I just eat so that I could put something in my stomach and to gain some strenght. I've been feeling dehydrated, too, the whole time.

I thought to myself that I must've had an infection: pulmonities, probably. But it wasn't. I didn't have the obvious symptoms so I was feeling lucky that I didn't have the dreaded disease these days. As it turned out, after the blood tests, I had the dengue strain! Probably, during the first time I had the fever, I got it. However, there are already anti-bodies produced against it in my blood. That is not to say, though, that it won't develop into a different dengue strain. I have to be wary with the changes that may occur in my body like bleeding and rashes. The good thing is, my platelet count is normal and far from danger.

By tonight, we'll be going back to the hospital to have my platelet count. As of the moment, I was given supplementary medicines.

It's Now Official!

I don't have a job! Actually, it could also be unofficial. I don't know. But for sure, I'm out of the job. I have sent a message to my employer asking for a break to think things over. In the SMS, I told him that I am freaking out and feeling like I couldn't do a job. I told him that I was out of town and couldn't find a signal. Therefore, if he wanted to talk to me, he won't be able to. Thinking that he'd get the idea of the difficulty in reaching me, he assumed that it was my way of saying that I want out. He then sent me a message saying that it seemed that I didn't want to talk anymore. If so, just please return this and that.

If he was disappointed with how I have treated this situation, I understand. I'm not so good with confrontation (or confronting my feelings) especially if it involves people that I care about. However, frankly speaking, I am disappointed, too, with how he dealt with this. He was asking for the "papers" I worked on for about a week. As if everything in them were his ideas. Of course, I'd give them to him. I have no reason of keeping them. What I'm concern about is that he failed to at least acknowledge that I have worked my ass off during the times I was in his office. In case we'd talk, I would even tell him not to pay the hours I spent in the office. Pampalubag-loob kumbaga. But he didn't even say anything about it. As if telling me that I didn't do anything! When, in fact, he told me earlier that he'd be paying me for the feasibility study. I'm offended... Oh well, I can't do anything about it anymore. I guess this is the payment for what I did.

My other concern, as well, is that I don't want him to think badly of me. However, it would be inevitable. I just have to accept it. Besides, I couldn't help it if people would think so and so about me. My greatest adversary, though, is myself. I hope that I could get over this. The sooner, the better...

Freaked Out

It has been four days and I haven't reported from work. Last week, I said that I was sick. Today, I didn't say a thing. I just turned my fone off. The truth is, I am freaking out! I still have no clue on what to do. I have been praying and asking God for answers. I don't if I had already received them and just didn't recognize it or He was leaving me to decide on my own. Last night, I have dreamt mostly about death and impossible situations happening. I'm not sure if the answers were hidden behind those dreams.

What's worst is that I am feeling guilty with these absences. My employer is very kind to me and the last thing on my mind is hurting him. I don't have any idea what to say to him. And I don't just want to go back to work with this on my mind. Basically, that is what bothering me the most. I don't want to leave him empty-handed or disappointed on me. It would hurt me a lot if leaving him would 'cause a rift in our relationship. I'm afraid, though, that if I continue, he'd end up disappointed, as well, because I won't be giving my best efforts.

Oh, God. Please give me the wisdom to decipher what to do and the courage to do it...

On Video: Pa-Siyam (RP 2004)

Pa-Siyam came out a few months after the highly-successful Pinoy horror flick Feng-Shui. Of course, good publicities for the film were left and right. I had my doubts because it was from Regal Films. Regal Films and horror are words that truly don't jive with one another. Most Regal horror films are highly commercialized that stories are being overlooked. True enough, when the movie came out in theaters, it turned out that the good publicities were all hype!

When I went to the video stores, Pa-Siyam was available. I wasn't really too keen on watching it but I told myself, what the heck? Let's see what is it all about. I wasn't expecting anything good. I wanted to know how the movie truly sucked!

Pa-Siyam is about five siblings who came back to their hometown to bury their mother. The reason for her death was still unknown to them. After the burial, the family held the traditional 9-day novena (pa-siyam). From then on, a series of weird events happened to them. Until finally, they were able to uncovered the truth behind her death.

The moment I put the disc in, I started flipping the remote control - fast forwarding the film when there were no dialogues spoken. Actually, you really wouldn't miss a thing because, for a so-called horror film, it dragged a lot! There wasn't even any scenes that would make you crawl out of your skin. So, for a horror film, this movie sucked big time!

HOWEVER

For the movie to work, one should not take it as a horror flick but rather a psychological thriller/drama kind of movie. The strange events weren't scary but rather weird. So the weirdness of it all wouldn't get one scared but rather seek answers. Besides, there is nothing scary about your own dead mother trying to make her presence felt among her children. A dead relative isn't the best one to use as a horror creature.

Because it is oh-so-slow, you have to sit right through it till you get the answers. In that respect, it is already a psychological ride ala A Tale of Two Sisters. And I suggest that you stay put because you might never know, you may get the suprise twist of your life! But of course, it really isn't that twisted but commendable enough to pull you through and rip your heart out in the end! Trust me, if you were one of the siblings, you might think of killing yourself afterwards!

Pa-Siyam has the distinction of using the being "the first horror movie to be shot using high-definition digital tape with original live audio on the soundtrack". For that, it is really commendable! From that start of the film, it would really make you get the weird feeling. The use of green color for the entire film was great! Plus, music soundtrack was eerie! It would make you feel like bawl yourself to death while credits are going on. But the story surely needed some more polishing.

My recommendation, try Pa-Siyam. Just do as I tell you and you won't get disappointed.

Conglomeration of Smilies

I have a job. Yehey! I should be rejoicing, right? Actually, I don't remember if I did rejoice about it. I know that I did feel glad when I was offered the job. It was a case of "ask and you shall receive" kind of thing. When the opportunity came, I immediately grabbed it without really thinking the things that would be asked from me. The cards were laid on the table yet I didn't go through each and every of them. I was looking after the fact that it would give me the future that I was hoping to have. What I overlooked is the hardships that it would entail to reach that aspiration.

Don't get me wrong. I am not someone who would just give up because of the difficulties of the job. But my dilemma now is that I don't have a clue re my job. It isn't my forte. I know that I said that I was told about the job description before accepting it. I was even given a few days to think about it. However, the problem was that I didn't think of it thoroughly. I became blinded with what's ahead and not with what's in front of me.

Self-fulfilling Prophecy
Biboy had already warned me about the job. Back then, I didn't understand why he was rejecting the idea of me accepting the job. Then, dad said "Try mo muna ng one week. Baka di mo magustuhan." That shocked me even further! How could he say such a thing? How could Biboy react that way? Was there a sign on my forehead that said "Danger ahead"?

What to Do?
I don't know. I'm filled with confusion at the moment. This week has started on the wrong foot. First, I was awaken by my best friend's message saying that his father has passed away. Second, I was so disappointed that we couldn't even be with him in this time of turmoil because his father's dying wish is to be buried in Pangasinan where he has spent his last days. Pangasinan isn't unreachable but it is just too far. It makes me terribly sad that I couldn't be with Than-than these days.

Third, I came to realize that I don't know what I was doing in my job. I don't want to disappoint my employer because he has put all his trust on me. He has high expectations of me. He even said "Excited na ko sa maaari mong gawin!" I'm afraid that I won't be able to live up to his standards because I don't understand what I was doing. Not to mention that I don't want to disappoint myself.

I have also other worries. For one thing, I am alone with the job. No help whatsoever. I have to decide on my own and come up with the best possible plans that would fulfill my employer's vision. Sure, he gives some output once in a while or pitch in some ideas. But the fact remains that it's gonna be all on me and he himself doesn't have much idea on what to do. That's why he hired me for the job - not exactly for my knowlegde but for the passion he sees in me! But the passion is slowly dying down everyday. It isn't giving me enough strenght to hold on and continue with what I'm supposed to. Every waking day is becoming a struggle.

What have I put myself into? Moreso, the pay isn't that encouraging enough...

When Fate Play Its Dirty Tricks
As if all the confusion was enough to keep me stranded, there goes another situation. Biboy lost his *new* celfone! Someone stole it from him on the bus! OMG! A new and expensive fone given as a gift to him by his father! Just last Saturday, the rift between them have seemed to smoothened out. All is well, ika nga. But how could have this happened?! Nananadya ba talaga ang pagkakataon?

He's definitely gonna receive some blows from him and his mother since this isn't the first time he lost a fone. He was already marked for life by the incident before and now, he'd just gonna prove them right. Aside from that, it was an expensive fone!

Biboy initially wanted us to replace the fone. I know how scared he must be feeling. But what will it do? We don't have that kind of money to buy such fone. Using a credit card would just drown us more in debts since we have been paying more debts as it is today. He said that he would pay it using his salary. How? He won't be making enough money to survive his everyday expenses and the would-be payment.

Bakit Ganito?
He's been feeling down about his job. He wants to quit.

I am having doubts about my job. I feel like like quitting before it's too late.

What should we do? Why is this happening to us? Could someone please give me answers?

I'm Not Usually This Vocal But...

Representatives from Prudential Life Plans have been calling me for 3-4 months now. They have told me to pick up the "free" insurance plan that they would give me in their office. Because I don't usually go (and don't feel like going) to Makati, I wasn't able to drop by their office. Until a few days ago, a representative told me that the insurance plan was in Ortigas already. Feeling quite bad about not getting it-- you know, I felt that I should at least be grateful that I'd be given an insurance plan for free, I decided to go and get it.

When I entered their office, there were lots of people "claiming" their "free" insurance plan. There were also noises coming from the other rooms where people were talking. Because of that, I felt anxious about the whole thing. Did I make the right choice? A guy (whom I forgot the name) came to me and said that he would be assisting me. Assist me with what?! Can I just get the insurance and leave?

So I was taken in a room where three other groups were talking. From the moment I sat on the chair, the guy began explaining about their saving/pension plan. Uh-oh, I told myself! I think I knew what was about to happen. He talked about savings, death, emergency, and the works! The usual speech of someone selling an "insurance". I listened to him attentively yet not really absorbing what he is saying. At the back of my mind, I felt that I was about to get duped.

After all the talk, he mentioned about my credit card being the one responsible for the payment of my so-called savings. That was the time when I knew that I had to speak up. He asked me for my credit card but I refused. I asked him, "So it would mean that I have to pay for this savings along with my purchases? E de lalaki ang gastusin ko niyan imbes na makatipid?" Of course, he then proceeded with his recorded speech.

"Sir, savings nga po ito. At least may makukuha kayo 'pag nangailangan kayo..." His words are to that effect.

"Oo nga. Still, kailangan ko ring bayaran yan. Sa'n naman ako kukuha ng pambayad niyan? Poproblemahin ko pa yan!"

"Pwede n'yo naman po i-terminate. Saka kung ano lang ang kaya ng budget nyo."

"Ayoko pa rin..."

"Try lang po natin. Tutal for approval pa lang ito. At least na-try n'yo. Ngayon lang po namin ito ino-offer..."

"E kapag na-approve, ano na gagawin ko?"

"E sir..."

This time, I felt that I need to stand my ground. "Look, I appreciate and understand your explanation. The thing is, wala akong ipambabayad diyan. Wala nga akong trabaho, e. Iintindihin ko muna 'yung gastos ko sa ngayon kaysa sa susunod pa."

He again talked about having financial problems in the future. I know that my reasoning about not thinking about the future is wrong but hey, I have to get my point across to this man! So I further added, "Ganito kasi 'yun. I went here cuz you have been calling me several times. I felt that I should be at least be grateful to what you're giving me. But I was told that it was free..."

"Free nga po itong insurance. Pero kasama po kasi sa package 'yung savings plan..."

"E de ganun din? Hindi pa rin free! Isa pa, you're telling me that you are offering this today." Actually, may sinabi pa siyang 1 minute lang ang ibibigay sa 'kin. After that, the offer is no longer available, parang ganun. "You are not giving me enough time to think. You are putting me on the spot. At hindi tama 'yun! To add to that, you're pressuring me..."

"Sir, kailangan po kasi ng pressure dahil nagyon lang 'to..."

"'Yun nga 'yung ayoko, e! I don't want to be pressured with these kind of stuffs!"

Medyo natahimik na siya. "Okay, sir. Pirmahan n'yo na lang po itong free insurance plan."

"And then what?"

"Wala po. Free 'yan. No obligations."

So I did. Afterwards, I fill out the raffle coupon. Then I left...

Before I left, though, I heard the agent saying to his co-agents, "Di ako nagwagi." Pasensya ka! Ako napunta sa 'yo, e!

I don't usually talk like that to "strangers". But I felt that I was deceived and I didn't like it. Ako pa ang lolokohin nila? I know how their speech works! I was trained in a computer-selling company for a week after I graduate. I was also deceived then. I thought that I was getting a job, 'yun pala pagbebentahin ako along with some other duped people. (Ang siste, they would tell that if you buy the computer on that day, free printer will be given! Only for that day kasi last day. So the customers are forced to make a decision. When in reality, you are paying for the printer, as well! Kasama sa presyo 'yun! Because I don't like pressuring people to buy stuffs from me, I left the so-called job as soon as the training was over.) Aside from that, I know how the pressure tactics work! I won't be put in agreeing with a situation that I would regret afterwards! I'm not that stupid!

Here my other thoughts re what happened. How could I buy from an agent who is younger than me? How could he made me believe that he was already saving for his future? Yeah, right! Aside from that, how could I be convinced by someone who spells "transfer" as "transper" and "lump sum" as "lumsum"?!

If the insurance was really "free" from anything, why couldn't they send it at home directly? At least, they wouldn't be hassled to call us every now and then. Palibhasa may hidden agenda! They want to bring people in their territory and pressure them from giving what they want!

Isa pa, how would I know the offer was legit? May magagawa pa ba ako kung hindi?!

The moment I felt anxious, I thought of "Family First" immediately! My advice, never ever receive free movie tickets from "Family First" representatives! Because once you do, they'd ask you for your name and number. They'd call you and ask you to come to their office. Before you know it, sinisipsip na ng mga linta ang dugo mo!

Credit card companies should be reported to the proper authorities! They shouldn't be giving names and contact numbers of their account holders. This is definitely an act of violation! Savings nga pero talong-talo ka naman sa interest na babayaran mo! Iisahan n'yo pa kami! Utot nyo!

There is nothing wrong about insurance plans as long as you get them from legitimate sources or referrals from people you know. Maybe PLP is legit but the way they do their business is wrong!

Lastly, I guess, there is really no such thing as "free" in this world!

Surprise, Suprise? Not!

Mark Feehily of Westlife finally came out of the closet and admitted that he is gay! He has this to say:

I want people to know the truth. I am gay and I'm very proud of who I am. I'm not asking for sympathy, or to be a role model for someone else. I simply felt it was the right time to tell the truth. In the past I haven't felt the need to say anything about my sexuality. But I want people to know I'm very comfortable with who I am. I'm not worried about how people react because I'm happy being who I am. I'm still the same person the day I was before. I'm sure Westlife fans will be pleased I'm happy. I don't think it changes anything. All the lads in Westlife have settled down and are in relationships, so why can't I be?

Good for him! After all, it is quite obvious. (Is it or it is just me who noticed?) I knew it all along. I have sensed him a mile away the way I did with Stephen Gately of Boyzone. The difference, though, is that I had a crush on Stephen and I loathe Mark! What is so obviouse about Mark's gayness? Oh, c'mon! Whose self-respecting straight man would have Mariah Carey's poster mounted on the wall of his room? Unless it shows a naked Mariah in it with all her two tons of breats in full glory! Aside from that, does a straight man singer belts out a tune everytime ala Mariah?!

I can relate, though, to why decided to come out. He is in love (with another member of a boy band just like Stephen)! Who wouldn't want to express to the world the feeling you have for your special someone? Even I decided to tell my close friends about myself when I first had a relationship. (Not the first time I fell in love. That's a different story!)

But let me comment on the words "What A Waste" at the bottom of the front page. I hope that it is referring to another topic and not Mark's sexuality. Because saying that wouldn't be so appropriate at all! I've heard several "homophobes" or "not learned" ones utter the word "sayang" when they learn that a certain guy they know turned out to be gay. How could being gay be "sayang"? Would you be less of a person if you are gay? Would you turn out to be embarrassing to belong to the human race? I don't think so! There are gay people who are better than their straight counterparts! Who would want an egotistic and self-righteous straight man beside them more than a responsible and caring gay guy?

Courtesy & Jealousy

We have met lots of customers. Of all ages and personalities. Of course, there's nothing irritating like a customer who would bombard you with text messages re their orders or your whereabouts during pick-up/delivery. Some people would also act as if you owe them something and want their stuffs be done right at the time they made the order or payment. Of course, no matter what their quirks are, we still try to deal with them pleasantly. But there are times that they go overboard. The times when they be so demanding to the point that they disrespect us. Treating us as if we are their slaves and we are at their beck and call. When that happens, we talk to them about it and not receive any orders from them. No matter how large their bill is. It is not the amount that matters to us. It is the service we provide them and the fact that we are able to work hand in hand. If they start to act like we are their slaves and they are our master, then good bye! So long!

One other type of customers that I find irritating, too, are the ones that treat us like "call boys." These people are the type who are quite embarrassed with their purchase that during deliveries. They tend to pay and leave immediately. No small talks. No smiling. Not even a "Hi". As if saying, "Let's get this over and done with! Pronto! Then I don't ever want to deal with you again." Why? Because mostly, these guys are the closeted ones! Okay. Fine! Stay in the closet! But again, at least be nice to us! We are not your servants!

Speaking of "servants (kuno!)", when I am in a mall and a guard or salesperson greet me, I greet them back. Or I nod my head to acknowledge their greeting. Why? Because it is not just the polite thing to do but the right one! How could you ignore a person who had greeted you? They have made an effort to greet you so would at least smile back at them or acknowledge them as a person?

In line with that is when people hand out your fare to the driver, common courtesy would tell you to at least say "Thank you" to the one who helped you. Is it really such a hard thing to do these days? Sobra na bang bastos ang mga Pinoy sa kapwa Pinoy?!

Anyway, in another story, I met this guy tonight. For "security" (for myself!) reasons, let's just not name him here. Hehehe. We just talk for a few seconds while doing "business" with each other. Biboy was waiting then. When I came back to him, he instantly guessed that I have a crush on the said guy! Of course, I can't deny it. I'm no good in lying. Besides, according to him, it was written all over my face! Like a "schoolgirl" with a crush! May pahimas-himas pa nga raw ako! Which for me wasn't consciously done. I was just making a gesture like a hand shake.

So ayun, he was kinda jealous about him. But I tried to appease him. It was just a crush. Besides, he's "straight". What can I do about that, eh? Still, he was jealous. However, after a while, he said, "Come to think of it, though, he's kinda cute!" From then on, he also developed a crush on him! Pagsaluhan na lang daw namin! Hahaha! :-p

Not a Bogus SMS After All

Two to three days ago, I received an SMS from my friend Ne-an saying that she'd be leaving soon and that she'd already applied for roaming activation of her SIM card. I read it while I wasn't that fully awake yet and took it as a joke. I thought that the punch line was it was her SIM card who'd be roaming around the world. Something like that.

Today, Wheng called to asked me if Ne-an had left the country already. I said no and that the message was a joke. She told me that there wasn't any punch lines in the messages esp. with the last one she received from her. The message said that she's already in the airport. Wheng even called her in the office and was told that Ne-an already resigned. "Mag-aabroad ata," was the reply she got when she asked whether they know why she resigned.

I still couldn't believe it because it was so sudden. I just had spoken to her a week ago re the magazine and she didn't say a word. I told Wheng to call her house and ask. She did and it was confirmed! She left for Germany as a delegate for the coming "World Youth Day" and would go to Italy afterwards. Sa Italy, dun na siya "magtatago".

I feel so bad because amongst my college friends, we three are the only ones that are in constant communication. Nabawasan pa. Not only that, the thought of her going "TNT" is quite bothersome for me. I fear for her life. I know that she's one tough woman but still, I am scared for her. I also feel bad that I didn't respond to her message. If I did so, I would've known that she was truly leaving the country. I could've said good bye and good luck at least.

I know that she has plans of going abroad but I didn't expect that she would leave without a warning or at least good byes. I guess she felt embarrased with what she is about to do. But I'm not ashamed of her. I salute her for her guts and determination to have a better life.

I'm hoping the best for her.

***

Speaking of SMS, I went through Biboy's messages earlier. I don't really do it but I just felt like doing it earlier. There was a message there from so-called Chika Babe. The message says: "Good night. Good luck tomorrow. Sa-rang-he."

As soon as he woke up, I asked him who that was. He told me that it was me. I said that I don't remember texting such message. Then, he search for the number and as it turned out, it was my Chikka account number!
Hahaha! So silly of me! I swear, I don't remember sending that message!

The Invasion of the Foreign Bodies

For someone who is "sobrang malikot" as Angel, it is quite unbelievable that she hasn't been in some sort of a "major" accident like hurting her fingers in an electric fan or something like that. Once, she tried plugging the t.v. onto the socket in the kitchen. Good thing that I was able to stop her because the plug isn't that secure enough. "Wag mo na uulitin yan," I told her. "Makukuryente ka! Alam mo kung ano ang mangyayari pag nakuryente ka? Mamamatay ka!"

Then, when we were back inside the house, Angel said, "Da, di ko na uulitin 'yun, a?"

"Bakit," I asked.

"Kasi mamamatay ako pag inulit ko 'yun. Ayoko pang mamatay," she added.

It's amazing that she already understood the concept of death even at the age of 3. Maybe not its whole definition but at least she gets to understand a little.

Anyway, her not being in a "major" accident is too good to be true. Before 12 AM tonight, Ginger noticed a styrofoam ball inside her nose! It is really small and could fit well inside a nose. It is the one being used in bean bags. Who knows how long it has been there?

Afraid that I might push it further while taking it out, we decided to bring her to the hospital. It was a simple procedure really. It didn't take 5 minutes to take it out. Dad told me that I should have just taken it out myself. It cost him PhP1150.00 as damage kasi. Such a big amount for something so fast and easy. However, it is better to be sure than sorry. I don't wanna take any chances.

As it turned out, the nurses said that she was the sixth child who came in the emergency room with the same situation. "Uso yan," one of the them said. Children seemed to be putting stuff inside their noses lately.

I still hope, though, that no major accident would happen to Angel other than that. I don't think that I would be able to handle if she gets hurt really bad...

Stupid Ka!

The Correspondents featured the topic of "Child Pornography" tonight. What struck me the most was the 9-yr. old girl who took off her clothes while she was being photographed and video taped. It really broke my heart as the bugaw instructs her on what to do. "Put on your panty," she would say. "Take them out slowly." I can't help but imagine Angel in that situation. I would really kill the person who do such thing to her!

"Child Pornorgraphy" and "Pedophilia" are always related. According to the report, it started here in the Philippines during the 80's. Some of Apocalypse Now's film crews who happened to be pedophile's dated children in Laguna and gave their families money. Learning how easy it is to do it here, other foreigners started going here to seduced young boys and girls into having sex with them. Even though the authorities had seized some of those foreigners, till now, the crime is going on.

I remember suddenly this comment that Rosch, Biboy's co-worker, made re Michael Jackson and the kids that he supposedly abused. He said, "Hindi naman totoo 'yun, e! Gusto rin ng mga bata 'yun!" I swear, if he had said that in front of me, I could slap his face! How dare him to say such things! He doesn't know a single thing about children and abuse. Ang tanga-tanga mo! People who are as dumb as you should rot in hell along with the pedophiles! Mas masahol ka pa nga sa mga pedophiles!